Freedom and Happiness

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I deserve to be happy,

I deserve to feel good from head to toe and not

have someone destroy me
because they think they have a right to me
I am not a thing or an object
I deserve to be free and love who I want
and not be punished because of
what I want or feel
I deserve the peace that comes from
feeling wanted (not by you)
I deserve to gain life experience
I deserve to have a bf (not you)
and get to know him, and talk,
and go out often, and be chased by him,
and be hugged by him,
and be kissed by him
I have never cuddled
I don't know how it feels to have that security
Teenagers have relationships
and I can't have it
I don't want it from you
You had your chance
You had tons of chances
I want someone else
and I will go to great lengths
to get you out of my life
I can't live like this
It is making me sick
I deserve my freedom
To not have someone watching me all the time
and controlling all the details in my life
I deserve to have things that are just for me
No one can interfere
They remain my secrets
I deserve my freedom so I can have my health
I deserve to have who I want
Not someone who is trying
to force their love on me
I want so badly to have my freedom
it is making me sick
and the despair and feeling of helplessness,
like I'm locked in a prison
And someone else is calling
all the shots in my life
It's the worst feeling in the world...
you can simply not imagine
To put someone through so much
is unimaginable
After everything I've been through,
after all I've endured,
all I want is my freedom
to be with who I want
I can have anyone,
so stop trying to make it look like I cant
Don't think you can make me settle for you
after you break me as a person
I despise you
and all the methods you've used
to keep me from everyone and everything
I have no confidence because of you
Thank you very much for everything
You don't deserve me at all
And if you think what you feel is love
your actions speak more
and you need to get your head examined
Leave me alone, or next time I see you,
I will scream my head off 

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